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7/18/2005

Top 5 Republican Blog Rants

OK, I'm going to try something new here. Each Monday I will take a look back at the previous weeks Conservative blogs and present the Top 5 crazy, cooky, whacked-out posts. The hardest part about this is going to be limiting it to five. Here we go.

5. In Sibby's continuing effort to dumb down South Dakota, he offered up a post entitled "
Hildebrand and Iowa AG Tom Miller". In the post Sibby tries to say that there is some sort of conspiracy between Daschle and Iowa AG Tom Miller in an attempt to damage John Thune by bringing down Dan Nelson. As "proof" of the conspiracy Sibby offers this,

"Gore already has received the endorsements of Christie Vilsack, (the wife of Iowa Gov. Tom Vilsack), U.S. Rep. Leonard Boswell (Iowa's sole Democratic congressman), state Attorney General Tom Miller and more than two-thirds of the state's 64 Democratic state legislators.

According to Gore's Iowa state manager, Steve Hildebrand, the endorsement is significant not only because Harkin is the highest-ranking Democrat in the state and the only Democrat to be elected three times from Iowa to the U.S. Senate, but because of Harkin's closeness to key Democratic groups in the state. Gore needs to keep those groups within his camp to fend off a challenge from Bill Bradley."

Say, that is amazing. A Democrat AG endorsed a Democrat Vice President in his bid to become President, and on top of that a Democrat ran said VP's campaign in Iowa. Talk about your smoking guns! On that theory I must be involved too. I am a Democrat. I voted repeatedly for Tom Daschle. I endorsed Al Gore for President. I live in a state that shares a border with Iowa. Connect the dots.

4. SD Politics has an interesting little post entitled "Patriot Fact". You can click on the link, but here is the entire post.

"According to a new poll reported in the London Times (see Real Clear Politics), the British Public backs strong new laws to prevent terrorist acts. This should sober the American Left. Its all well and good to worry about FBI agents combing through our library records, but the American People aren't yet worried about terrorism, not really. They know that most of us are about as likely to die in a terrorist attack (of the recent kind) as we are to perish of excessive exercise.

But one of these days something may happen that will put the fear of the reaper into hearts deep in the heartland. If it does, we may be willing to accept virtually anything that will make us feel more secure. If you want avoid such reactions you have to prevent that terrible event. Maybe if the Democrats spend as much time worrying about that, they'd be better serving civil liberties."

So just to recap. Americans are not worried about terrorism. That explains the WAR ON TERROR I guess. Why not just ask Americans to "inform" on their friends and neighbors who are acting un-American? You know, things like questioning the President, questioning John Thune, reading Catcher in the Rye, subversive stuff like that. It almost seems SDP is rooting for something to happen to put the fear of the reaper into our hearts. Cool. Very patriotic.

3. Ryne McClaren was trying for a Weird Al-type parody with this one I guess, but let's just say he missed. A special note for Sibby on this one, Ryne uses the word "shit" and the word "ass" in this post, and I know how sensitive you are to bad language on blogs so you might wanna skip this one.

"A long, long, time ago I can still remember how they thought we never lied; And I knew when we had our chance We could make it up in advance And their Presidential chances would be fried; And then them bloggers made me shiverWith every correction they'd deliver Truth was at their fingers Their criticism lingers; I can't remember if I spit When Dan Rather's career went to shit The bloggers boots in my ass they hit The day the scandal died
So bye bye to the CBS eyeWent to MoveOn to get my groove on but I didn't know why; And them basement boys hookin' up to WiFiSingingThis is not the day that you lie; This is not the day that you lie............"

2. I hate to pile on Sibby, but it's just so easy. Here is one called "Dan Nelson Caught on Technicality". Yeah, funny how the law is just some technicality.

"In Iowa they have some kind of technicality that requires certain filings be done in the same county the person resides in. That was what Dan Nelson apparently failed to do correct

I'm sure SDP would be willig to overlook a "technicality" like the law in the name of the Patriot Act, but fortunately the Iowa AG isn't.

1. The craziets Republican Rant of the week goes to...Sibby! This one is called "Ellsworth, Dan Nelson and ears". In it basically Sibby says that Dan Nelson bears no responsablity at all for his business going bankrupt and that Democrats hate poor people because we think it's wrong to allow them to buy a car at four times it's value and at rock bottom 25% interest rates. You'll just have to read it, but here is part of it.


"Instead it is the Democrats who may have created more poverty that results from people losing their jobs. And the Dan Nelson bankruptcy is a case in point."

And,

"What the Democrats refuse to talk about is how the actions of a pro-Democrat operative in Iowa resulted in the loss of South Dakota jobs, jobs that were provided by Republican supporter Dan Nelson."

And,

"The Democrats claim the are for the poor. But they seem to care less about the jobs lost when the doors to all of Nelson's business were shut down"

And,

"Perhaps it was due to Steve Hildbrand having Tom Miller's ear that the lost of South Dakota jobs occurred."

I hope you enjoyed this first installmentent. Please send me your nominations for next week.

5 Comments:

At 7/18/2005 07:32:00 PM, Blogger Sophia said...

Outstanding! Please don't stop.

 
At 7/18/2005 08:05:00 PM, Blogger Todd D. Epp said...

PL, you nutmegged the GOPers!

 
At 7/19/2005 09:08:00 PM, Anonymous Ryne said...

Trent:

The text quoted from my site wasn't written by me, it was posted by Blaine in the comments to the post. So technically I didn't "miss" anything (aside from my own lame headline, which I take credit for).

The "shit" and the "ass" are also Blaine's, but I wholeheartedly endorse the message he's trying to send. (I also like other loud, funny words.)

Blaine's quite funny though, and I enjoyed his little ditty immensely. I wish he'd start a blog of his own.

So do you have to give Epp's Gold Star back now, or will he let you keep it anyway? I hope he lets you keep it.

 
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